This week has been an interesting one...Because of the nature of working with people, vagueness is necessary and that's okay...There are two ways at looking at my life or rather my work right now. The first is seeing the pain that is so prevalent in the people around me and even in myself and wondering why. The second view is that this pain that has come to the surface is a blessing and a tangible way to see that He is working in our lives and is bringing light to where there is darkness. I am trying to hold to the latter when circumstances are overwhelming and when my path crosses with people who are having to sit in the darkness and can't see the light. Either way, nervously holding a bleeding heart in my hand, sitting in grey and despair as someone spews out their pain, takes something out of me and I realize my wisdom is nonexistent...it all has to come from Him...I still don't get why most of the time.
It hadn't rained a day since we have been in California. I realized that on Monday and yearned for it to fall. I got so tired of rain at times in Oregon but now that it's gone I've found I need that balance in life. The rain and the sunshine, the pain and the joy. Anyway, sometimes being here, seeing the blue sky and shiny sun each day it feels unreal. There was one evening this week that was particularly rough. I wasn't feeling shiny and sunny and there did not seem to be blue in a lot of people's skies. And just at the point of darkness and blackness, it rained. I wonder if God rhythms the weather, the birds, the wind in the trees just to soundtrack our lives. Maybe it's not theologically sound, but I like to think so.
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I think God uses whatever means possible to communicate with us. I can't say for sure, but I've felt like God has spoken to me before through reading the side of a bus and an article in the newspaper.
Anyway, I'm not for sure if it was Francis Bacon or Thomas Browne, but those guys and most of the metaphysical poets believed that "Nature is the second book of God."
You and Drew are in my thoughts and my prayers.
Katie, I enjoyed your perspective and have identified with it so often. Although is rains in South Asia, it's a drenching drowning rain rather than the misty Oregon rain what slowly rejuvenates the soul. I miss the mist...the rain that you can walk in with freedom and assurance that you won't be overtaken by a flood.
Although, a good drenching is sometimes necessary...when the streets are full of human & animal feces, you don't really want to walk in the flood waters.
I'm praying for you guys.
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